It happens in all long-term relationships: Kids. Work. Life. Routine. Boredom.
Even some of the strongest relationships can run out of steam occasionally. Many times one person in the relationship (though it’s usually both of you) lament things are no longer the way they were in the beginning. This, also, is inevitable. Wanting things to be the way they were five, ten, or twenty years after the relationship has started isn’t realistic. BUT, just because things won’t be like they were when you were twenty-one years old doesn’t mean your dating life has to be any less special or memorable. It also isn’t just the desire for things to be new again. Rather, it’s the desire to connect on that deeper connection between the two of you.
Distance in relationships happens. We never intend to take our partners and the strength of our relationships for granted. It just happens. Life has a funny way of creeping in ever so slowly and stealing more and more time away from each other. Add in an expanding family, the normal stresses of everyday life, plus the exhaustion that comes with them and you can go months or even years without going on a date with your spouse… just the two of you.
It’s important – in every romantic relationship – to continually let each other know that you not only still love each other, but that your relationship together is just as important as every other aspect in your life. Dating your spouse or partner of many years lets them know you still like them and the person they are.
Dating your spouse lets you take the time to enjoy one another’s company, not just a few hours reprieve from the rest of life. It gives you a chance to talk about yourselves, each other, and your relationship.
Our focus cannot always be on our intimate partnerships; we have jobs, kids, commitments, and a myriad of other obligations to keep the majority of our time occupied. To keep your relationship going strong you must give it your undivided attention at least once in a while. Three hours out on a Thursday night might have been a regular occurrence when you were dating. After several years together, though, Thursday can become little more than Leftover Meatloaf & Netflix Night.
Take the time. Find the time. Negotiate the time. Whatever you need to do for you and your partner to go out on a date once a month. You make time for everything else in your life… why not your partner?